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penguinfaery) wrote2011-02-27 06:43 pm
penguinfaery) wrote2011-02-27 06:43 pm
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My grandmother passed away yesterday. She was my mom's step mom but always, always family. We were all very close, and I loved her a hell of a lot. I haven't seen her for a year and a half, since we went to AX, but we had a really nice lunch then, just her and I.
She was a strong, wonderful person, and I know she has missed my Papa Dave since he past...years ago now. And just been...sort of done living. But I'm still gonna miss her like crazy. She was something special.
I have weirdly been thinking a lot about her lately. The story about her giving me the Vampire Armand and being like "Enjoy, it's pretty much gay porn!:)" Came up like...twice in the last week or so. And my brains has just been...IDK. Back in the house at Estralita a lot.
I don't know if I'm going to the funeral. I'd rather get my mother out there for a longer amount of time to spend with her siblings, then go out myself, but I also don't want to not be with her.Plus there is family politics if I don't go that once upon a time I think my family did not have but...is not so true anymore. I don't think they would understand wanting to mourn in my own way. I also just...don't do well with death. I was...ok, at Sarah's grandmother's funeral,but barely and I didn't know her.
Yesterday was my mom's birthday. We had Tea at the Brown Palace which was pathetic and over priced ($119 for 3 people. It was in the lobby, which granted was a beautiful lobby, but also loud and awkward. And the food was delicious but you honestly got about half a plate for that much money. And the tea itself was nothing special.) But it made my mom happy, and she doesn't seem to be letting Grandma Jo's passing ruin that for her.
She was a strong, wonderful person, and I know she has missed my Papa Dave since he past...years ago now. And just been...sort of done living. But I'm still gonna miss her like crazy. She was something special.
I have weirdly been thinking a lot about her lately. The story about her giving me the Vampire Armand and being like "Enjoy, it's pretty much gay porn!:)" Came up like...twice in the last week or so. And my brains has just been...IDK. Back in the house at Estralita a lot.
I don't know if I'm going to the funeral. I'd rather get my mother out there for a longer amount of time to spend with her siblings, then go out myself, but I also don't want to not be with her.Plus there is family politics if I don't go that once upon a time I think my family did not have but...is not so true anymore. I don't think they would understand wanting to mourn in my own way. I also just...don't do well with death. I was...ok, at Sarah's grandmother's funeral,but barely and I didn't know her.
Yesterday was my mom's birthday. We had Tea at the Brown Palace which was pathetic and over priced ($119 for 3 people. It was in the lobby, which granted was a beautiful lobby, but also loud and awkward. And the food was delicious but you honestly got about half a plate for that much money. And the tea itself was nothing special.) But it made my mom happy, and she doesn't seem to be letting Grandma Jo's passing ruin that for her.