penguinfaery | In the spirit of actually posting on my LJ...

10- I hate having celebrity crushes. It... embarrassed me? It is part self-consciousness (because lol, I'd never have a chance with ____), and part the fact as a younger person I had too good an imagination and fell to hard. So I'd make up a person with this celebrity/charact face and end up in love with someone that didn't exist.

9- I originally said I liked girl because everyone else I was with said they were bi too. It was Be and Casey, and that was when Be got the idea to start presuing me.

8- Sometimes I really hate being over weight. But I hate more changing myself to match what other people think is right. Our society is so fatphobic it's not even funny. I have never felt like my life has been seriously altered by other people because I am a lesbian, poor, or female. Dirty looks, comments, sure, but nothing that can't be brushed off at the end of that day. I feel it all the freakin' time because I am fat. As much as I wanna stad up and be a BBW, if someone offered me a skinny pill I'd take it in a heart beat.

7- I hate working. I have a wonderful job with a great company, and I am so thankful for it, but I am not a 9-5 Monday-Friday type of girl. It is the biggest inspiration to finish school.

6- I started making art to impress a boy. He later became my BFF for a few years, and art has been my BFF for many more.

5- I am extremely uncomfortable inviting myself into places. I won't join an rp friend are at unless they invite me, I won't push myself into other people's plans, even if I know they are awesome people who wouldn't mind.

4- I use tumblr to look at porn more then anything else. Some of it is because a lot of the "porn" is gorgeous. But also...just to look at porn.

3- It still bugs me, 4 months later, almost every day. I try not to deal with it because...there's just nothing else I can do. I tried to be healthy about it and got majorly cock blocked (like most of our relationship, bada ch~! Ha ha ew it was such a bad relationship D:) but I think she seriously broke something in me, and I dunno how to fix it. I don't want her back in my life in any way, shape or form, she is a gross person, I just...I dunno. So I just ignore it and focus on all the good I have. Which thankfully is a lot.

2- Building on the last in a good way...I cry when I think about what awesome friend I have. Literally. Not like every time, and really I cry easily. But I have such awesome people in my life.

1- Everytime "I Will Survive" come on my radio I turn my car radio up all the way and belt it.

Some of those are pretty srs btw.

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5...This so hard. My mother taught me to never invite yourself and always wait until they offer. So whenever I do it I feel so terrible about it (sometimes even when I am invited, I feel like the third wheel and so terrible jfkldsa)

Isn't it interesting how much our behaviours are shaped by our parents? My parents taught me a different lesson, bleeding, on the sidewalk in shock... (no wait, thats Bruce Wayne)... no my parents taught me "thems that asks, gets"...

Thanks, that takes a lot of courage to leave yourself open to such scrutiny. Perhaps at some point I will do the same, but for a multitude of reasons, my secrets have to stay that. If you would permit me some comments:

10. Interesting, I have imagined being just friends with someone famous, like Princess Di before her death, or maybe Jim Carrey. I imagine a celeb being relieved to have a friend they can just relax with. But if a celeb did not want to be noticed, I think they might have chosen to be accountants.

9. Hmm.

8. I can relate. I choose to be comfortable in my own skin. In deference to my son, I am starting a workout regimen with him and since i will be single at some point I have to work on making myself more appealing. Regarding BBW it has been my life experience that they tend to be extremely passionate, I suppose in part because if someone is willing to accept them as they are, they feel free to be more open. Perhaps its just good fortune.

7. For me I get a lot of personal satisfaction from my work, and I generally enjoy it as I have good pay, respect, a great boss, and perks. Thats not to say that I don't enjoy NOT working now and then, but I would be at a loss without something to do. hmm. Let me rephrase that. If I had sufficient wealth to cover a life without a job, I would be able to work on other things.

6. Has he seen some of your newer uber cool work?

5. Noted. I will try not to assume, but instead make a point to invite you whenever I can.

4. This one still fries my brain. Not the tumblr part, which I don't quite grok how it ties in, but the porn part. The common fact that some women like porn, video games, sci-fi and comics, technology, and --toys surprises me. Sheltered upbringing and 30 years with one person has warped my thinking a bit.

3. You are a person of passions and when you let your armor down its hard to avoid being wounded. And those wounds heal slowly, but they will heal. Trust me on this one.

2. I feel like I cry more than most males, and hardly the icon of stoic unflappabilty of my father and grandfather. I've tried to make it clear to my sons that it is okay to cry and anyone that tells you otherwise is selling you something.

1. Britney Spears "Stronger" is still a favorite, as are Disney songs. You must love "Chicken Little", eh?

In the spirit of actually posting on my LJ...

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Okay so thats two people to be sure to invite.

Thanks for sharing